Sunday, June 21, 2009

Biting Off More Than I Can Chew

I think I am at a crossroads.

But probably not. Because a "Being at a crossroads" infers a choice. And I don't think I have a choice.

Everyone in life has a combination of people who lift them up and people who weigh them down. I judge people by how they juggle their mix. I've always been pretty comfortable with my ratio.

Sure I make jokes "it's all about Maggie" - "all time is Maggie time" - but I also believe in a cosmic point system and I try to squirrel away some points for the day I stand at the gate. Of course I probably won't have a single point more than I need....let's not get carried away. I'll never be confused with Mother Theresa.

However, some things aren't a choice. Some things, I am simply compelled to do. I don't choose to take care of Tommy, Frankie, Bill or Dan. They are my boys.

I thought I was at the tail end of this and I remember thinking that I was glad that my cancer wasn't diagnosed until this point. It meant I could focus on that.....not that I've been all that focused....but that's another story, huh?

So it appears there will be one more......ah, what the hell do I call it? Project? Complication? Undertaking?

Yeah, I guess undertaking. Dan has a problem. I want Dan to come back. Frankie is going to go get him.

I am filled with dread.


Tom Goering said...

"We are defined by what we do with the things we can control and how we react to the things we can not." For the time I have been exposed to you Maggie you have more than enough "points".

MC Hammer would have titled the song "Maggie Time" but didn't want to be too presumptuous :)

Greta Perry said...

I had a hunch something was wrong. Maybe it was because you did not answer my email and have not been on Twitter - but nevertheless, I'm here for you as are all your milblog friends!

Bill Bullard said...


"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us." - Gandalf (yeah, I'm an LoTR geek)

I can't speak for the years before you first "got all up in my grill" on Bunker Hill Street that fine June afternoon in 2007, but the time I've known you since then is proof of the wonderful person you are.

You're in my thoughts.

Rick said...

Maggie, Christ has all the points that you need. Trust in Him and his sacrifice for YOU. He died for us all we need to do is put our trust in Him. That is all.. yes it is that simple. I am praying for you. Rick

Mrs. Diva said...

Some of us KNOW you have points to spare. If you need anything, you have my number and I'll always be there to answer if you call.