Monday, June 23, 2008

One Step Forward - Two Steps Back

It's almost as bad as dancing with my father! Don't get me wrong, I love my father and he is a great dancer. I, on the other hand, sway. What can I say, I am left's my excuse for everything.

Anyway, back to the subject. My summer project/vacation that I can't talk about yet will involve some physical activity. So I am trying to get into don't-have-a-heart-attack-the-first-day condition. It will involve stairs. So I get the bright idea that I will start using the StairMaster at the gym. Christ-on-a-cracker! I almost killed myself.

First day, I get on and do it until my legs are trembling, I look down and through blurry eyes I think it says 3:56. Three minutes and 56 seconds? What the hell! I'll have to find the tubbiest person and walk behind them. That way when I pause on the stairs I can pretend it's because the other person paused. I tell the girls in work. They are hysterical. I don't ask for their times. I don't want to know.

Next visit to the gym, I set it for five minutes. If I did 3:56, I should be able to up it a minute. Jennifer told me later that was ridiculous. I do it until my legs are trembling again and I see that only two minutes have elapsed. Two minutes? How can this be? How can I be moving backwards? I push and push and pant and push and get to four minutes and two seconds. Good God!

After my shower I go over to the kiosk that gathers all the info and I am checking my times and reps, etc. I see that the first time wasn't was 1:36!!! LOL I must have been delirious.

Anyway, I'm not giving up. Tonight I made it to 4:20. You know, once upon a time I used to bound up the 294 steps of the Monument. backwards steps? Pizza before the gym with my boss and a banana here in front of the computer. Bananas and pizza are not allowed on Atkins.....especially not the banana.

I think there are M&Ms in my room. Doesn't everyone keep an emergency stash?

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