Yesterday I slipped in the shower (on some very expensive hair conditioner, what a waste) and banged my hip on the wall before sliding to the floor. It hurt. To compound my pain FoxNews was playing all sorts of "arthritis", "brittle bones" "getting older" commercials while I was dragging my poor self to my room. I have told various people and most have been very nice and sympathetic.
He called last night. I told him my tale of woe. I didn't detect the proper degree of sympathy, as a matter of fact there was much laughter. "I've fallen and I can't get up!" he crowed. So I pointed out that I could have broken my hip. "But you didn't." came his reply. I told him he had a poor attitude. He asked me of I was a PANSY!!!!!
Hey, fathead!!!!! I'm not supposed to be as tough as you. Pardon me if I'm not full of grapeshot from the Revolutionary War, like some people I could name!