My Hair

When I was a little girl, my hair was black. At 16 it began to turn white. It's a common trait on my mother's side of the family. I let it turn for years, it came in quite handy. Grayhaired women seldom get carded, even when they should be.

In my mid 30s my mother's constant pleading won out and I began to dye it. It was over 50% white. At first, I did the do-it-yourself and that was ok for a while. My ex used to be really good at it after a couple of beers, or I would head over to my mother's house with the box of dye, some wine and crackers and cheese and my sisters and I would make a hen party of it.

Then my ex and I split and somehow I didn't think his new g/f would appreciate him coming over to dye my hair (although sometimes, if I had a date I would pop over and play with his daughter while he ironed my outfit, lol). So I began to go to a salon. At first, I wanted it to be dyed back to the natural color of my youth, but that's not really a good idea because it looks harsh on women as they age. So I went lighter...dark brown.....medium brown.....blond streaks....just shoulder length. People whose opinions I valued, liked it.

Then along comes SB. "Please don't cut it....ever." Fine.

Then "I've always wanted to date a redhead." Fine.

I go to my next salon visit and announce to Sue..."We have to dye it red." Chaos, other stylist are brought in. No one thinks it's a good idea. It fades, it's high maintenence (like me), it won't suit me, if you're not careful you can get "hot roots" (the white part growing in, now 75% would turn pink, ugh) ........ "Oh well" I say "SB always wanted to date a redhead...we can't have him dating anyone else, can we?!" They try it, holding their breath and in the end they love it. It is a HUGE pain in the ass to maintain. My appointments went from being every 4 weeks to every 3 weeks. I have to get a whole line of hair care products just to keep it from fading. The conditioner that keeps it the best is discontinued by Biolage and I have to bid for it on EBAY. My brother makes endless fun of me.

Friday night SB blows into town. It's hot and humid and despite my too-damn-expensive Phyto anti-frizz and my much sought after Biolage conditioner, my curls are limp and my hair is frizzy. The first words out of his mouth are "Your hair looks great, baby."

No shit, buddy..........I like it when I get my way too!