This Made Me Laugh Out Loud

Today's Tanker Brothers Rolling Victory Fast participant is Robert. I was reading his blog and saw this joke. Now I thought it was funny when I read the Democrat/Republican version....but his Democrat/Republican/Southern version is even better.

This Day In History

...in 1876, Congress established at New Bedford the first School of Instruction to train officers for the Revenue Service. The Service traced its history back to 1790 when Congress decided it needed to ensure that vessels entering United States ports paid tariffs on their cargo. In other words, they wanted to prevent widespread smuggling. Over the years, the Revenue Service took on additional responsibilities — protecting American ships from pirates, intercepting slavers after the Atlantic slave trade was banned, and assisting vessels in distress. In 1915 it merged with the Life-Saving Service and was renamed the United States Coast Guard. At that point the School of Instruction became the Coast Guard Academy, which has been located in New London, Connecticut, since 1910.

I Was A Good Girl Tonight

I stuck with Atkins all day and went to the gym this evening. Trish finally joined me! We share a membership and she seldom goes. Wish I had enough money to skip the gym and not feel guilty about wasting the dough!! (She reads this, so I'm really just needling her). I rewarded myself with a luxurious steammmmmmmmmmmmm. I really should go eat something. Friday is my day on the Tanker Brothers Rolling Victory Fast. I'm sure that day, I'll regret any chance I had at food that I passed up!

The Worst Naval Disaster in US History

At 12:14 a.m. on July 30, 1945, the USS Indianapolis was torpedoed by a Japanese submarine in the Philippine Sea and sank in 12 minutes. Of 1,196 men on board, approximately 300 went down with the ship. The remainder, about 900 men, were left floating in shark-infested waters with no lifeboats and most with no food or water. The ship was never missed, and by the time the survivors were spotted by accident four days later only 316 men were still alive.

The Discovery Channel has an interesting site.Another is here.

The oral recollections of Captain Charles B. McVay, III, USN, Commanding Officer of USS Indianapolis

I Have Been Remiss.......

....in not commenting on John's great adventure. He is blogging the return of the DD574 USS John Rogers. The Armorer is in his element! It may be a Navy ship, but it's big guns and history and a great opportunity to be part of something unique. I am following this story closely. It appeals to me for many reasons, not the least of which is that I have just read about some of Commodore Rogers exploits in Robert Allison's book on Decatur. Rogers is one of three men in his family the ship is named for.

You can read everything over at the Castle. This link is just posts on bringing the Rogers back to the States. Scroll down and start at the bottom.

Happy Birthday, John!

Frankie's Better

Frank has percocets and I got 10 hours of sleep. Things are better. Fortunately Frank plays soccer and not basketball, so I think he'll even try to play in his rec game Tuesday. He's still a little cranky and demanding.....but he is the Princess' son and you would be shocked if he was sweet. I told him that he offered to buy the young female doctor a beer and at first he looked surprised and then he asked what her reaction was. LOL Flirting with strangers....where'd he get that!

Thank you for all the supportive comments and emails.

Frankie

Last night out at his favorite hangout, Frankie fell into the campfire (off in the woods). He has 1st and 2nd degree burns on his right palm, wrist, and forearm. He was taken by ambulance to MGH. So with my grand total of 2.5 hours of sleep, I am home to shower and go to work. Because of moving the office, phones, computers etc., every work order is in my handwriting/private language. So there is no skipping today. I am headed to the office where there is no Internet......but I have the cell.

Frank was a riot on his morphine, explaining to the intern how you shotgun a beer....telling Erin, the nurse with the meds how grateful he was.......talking nonsense to everyone. If he wasn't so goodlooking, I would have drowned him in a river a long time ago.....too much trouble. Toni is there holding his hand....I am off to the shower.

Thanks Ogre!

Bill Clinton, a Rifle, and an Israeli Foxhole
Written by Doc Farmer
Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Well, it looks like World War IV is in full swing now. I say World War IV, because World War III already happened--the common name is the “Cold” War--and Reagan won that war. So, somebody please send a note to Newt Gingrich. Also, remind him that World War IV started “officially” for the United States on September 11, 2001, despite the fact that Islamofascists have been attacking America since 1968 (when Bobby Kennedy was assassinated).

Be that as it may, the current trigger to this war seems to have been pulled by Hezbollah and Hamas. They’ve kidnapped Israeli soldiers, and Israel is not all that happy with this state of affairs. Furthermore, they’ve moved rockets and missiles into Gaza and southern Lebanon--areas Israel agreed to move out of, so long as the other side promised not to use them for military purposes--and proceeded to lob ordinance indiscriminately into Israel.

Our ally, Israel, has responded with what some have called “disproportionate” force. Well, how would you make it proportionate? If you point a gun at a cop, must s/he only point one back at you without firing? If you shoot the cop, can s/he only shoot back the same number of times, and hit the same parts of your body? There’s proportionate response (which brings stalemate) and there’s appropriate response (which brings victory).

I think you can guess which type of response I prefer.

This latest conflict, however, brought to mind a story I read several years ago. America’s first Black President (and second Impeached President) was at a Hadassah fundraiser back in 2002. I recall this because I thought it was funny, totally bogus, and everything we’ve come to expect from Slick Willie, viz:

“The Israelis know that if the Iraqi or the Iranian army came across the Jordan River, I would personally grab a rifle, get in a ditch, and fight and die.”

Now, putting aside the fact that his provisos are pretty much impossible (the Jordan River is nowhere near any invasion front, no invasion is taking place, and the attackers are being orchestrated by Iran instead of using their own army), I have to wonder if our former Fornicator-in-Chief has the intestinal fortitude to make good on his statement. Israel, one of our closest allies, is under attack. Where’s Bill Clinton? Where’s his rifle? Where’s that foxhole?

At this point, I’d like to thank whoever in the upper military echelons taught him the difference between a rifle and a gun. Considering Clinton, this is an important lesson.

Israelis are doing what America SHOULD be doing. When they are attacked, they fight back--HARD. When their soldiers are kidnapped, they use all necessary force to get them back. When two of our troops were kidnapped, tortured, gutted, beheaded, and booby-trapped, our lib/dem/soc/commie media paid attention to it for only one day. Apparently, since they weren’t killed as a round number of some kind (1000, 2000, 2500, etc.) they didn’t merit their concern. Except, of course, to blame Bush.

And if the rest of the world doesn’t like it, TOUGH! They’re not the ones getting murdered by terrorists. Well, not yet, anyway. They’re not the ones being hit by state-sponsored Islamofascists. For the moment. However, many other countries (America, Bali, Germany, Saudi Arabia, England, India, Spain, etc.) have. Of those, only America and England have had the guts to engage in self-defense. It must really honk the lib/dem/soc/commies off big-time.

Nevertheless, what of Slick Willie and his “promise”? Sure, he was talking to a bunch of Jews at a fundraiser. Sure, he wanted cash. Sure, he wanted to look good. I’m certain he even bit his lower lip and forced an on-command tear every once in a while during that event. But he’s also a former president. A man whose word should mean something. Yes, yes, I know I’m talking about a Clinton here, but in the ABSTRACT, his word should mean something more than “give me your cash” or “let me cop a feel” or “you should probably put some ice on that.”

Ditzy Dean, the former governor and current DNC chairman, actually had the audacity to say that we wouldn’t be in this current situation in the Middle East if we had followed the “moral authority” of Bill Clinton. Two words which should never be uttered in the same sentence with any amount of seriousness. Moral Authority is the LAST thing that can be expected of Bill Clinton. Or, for that matter, Ditzy Dean, Teddy the Hutt, the Hildebeast, Jean François Kerrée, Nancy bin Pelosi, or most any other lib/dem/soc/commie. Okay, I’ll give Moral Authority props to Joe Lieberman, but he’s one of the very very few.

If Israel is truly an ally of America, why hasn’t Clinton gotten on to the next flight to Tel Aviv (sans Secret Service--they didn’t promise to defend Israel, Slick Willie did), put on some camo, pick up an Uzi, and start defending her? I’m sure his wife wouldn’t mind--after all, if he saves lives over there, she’s a hero in her presidential bid. If he is killed, even better for her--not only is she a hero, but also a widow, and therefore a victim who cannot be questioned by anybody. Further, she’d shed all of that political baggage he provides without recourse to a messy divorce. Frankly, I’m surprised she hasn’t darted him with chlorpromazine and FedEx’d his sorry butt to a defensive position on the Israel/Lebanon border by now.

Of course, this is all a moot point. Bill Clinton was, and ever shall be, a liar of the first degree. He said what he said back then for money. This makes Bill Clinton a whore of the worst kind--one that takes the cash and doesn’t deliver the goodies. Nothing new there, I suppose, but it’s kind of nice to see it illustrated so graphically.

Yet you’ll only see it illustrated here. As far as I know, not one MSM outlet has brought up Clinton’s statement from four years ago. That’s not surprising--since they didn’t really cover it when he MADE the statement. Nevertheless, it would be nice to see Bill Clinton actually keep his promises and stick to his word. For the novelty factor, if nothing else. It would also be nice to see the MSM try to hold a politician to account that isn’t a rep/con/tair, while allowing all manner of lies, obfuscations, flip-flops, and other crapola from the lib/dem/soc/commies.

So, Mr. Clinton, send us a post card from an Israeli ditch. Defend our ally with more than just words. Keep your promise (well, except maybe for the dying part--you should do your best to stay alive, just to honk off your wife!). Pick up a rifle, kill a few terrorists, and make the world a safer, better place.

And then, we’ll remind you of the irony that you couldn’t be bothered to do the same thing for OUR country, you draft-dodging bastard.

About the Writer: Doc Farmer is a writer and humorist who is also a moderator on ChronWatch's Forum. He formerly lived in Saudi Arabia and Qatar, but now resides in the Midwest. Doc receives e-mail at docfarmer9999@yahoo.co.uk

I thought this was great! It was forwarded to me by a former Navy guy who spends all his free time trying to get me to move down South and take up life as a kept woman. But I wouldn't be BostonMaggie if I were in New Orleans, would I? Anyway, after reading this and poking around a little, I realize that I've already been reading this guy. His blog is "A Sailor In The Desert" or I think it is. Maybe they just cross post.

AFSis ........

....actually imagines that there is more about me that could be revealed (me the Queen of Flashing!) or that anyone would give a shit! Here are her answers.


3 things that scare me:
1. Nothing, I am Princess Crabby.
2. Hot roots (when the real color of my hair - white, mixes with a bad dye job abd turns pink)
3. Peak chocolate (a la peak oil)

3 people who make me laugh:
1. My son, Tom
2. Kevin Meaney
3. Stephen Colbert/Jon Stewart (fav libs)

3 things I hate the most:
1. Waiting, when I have nothing to read.
2. Having to hold my tongue around stupid people
3. People who think everyone loves their pet the way they do

3 things I don't understand:
1. The ACLU
2. How a liberal's mind works
3. (That's it.....I'm wicked smart)

3 things I'm doing right now:
1. Stalling before I get in the shower
2. Reading email in bed
3. I can't say

3 things I want to do before I die:
1. Return to Dubai
2. Read every book in my house
3. Pay off all debts, leave something for my sons

3 things I can do:
1. Keep my head when it hits the fan (I throw up later)
2. Cook - not a lot of practice lately, the last time I really enjoyed it was Dubai
3. Drive people around me crazy....Mum, Dad, Jen, SB, etc.

3 ways to describe my personality:
1. Sarcastic
2. Narcissistic
3. Outgoing

3 things I can't do:
1. Sew, crochet, knit, my mother gave up in frustration even though she noted that they can teach monkeys these things
2. Drive a standard
3. Add crap to this blog, I want a blogroll and banners and stuff.

3 things I think you should listen to:
1. Me
2. Classical music, it's soothing
3. Your gut, my only regrets come when I don't go with my own instincts

3 things you should never listen to:
1. Advice from people who don't know you, just cause something happened to them.....
2. Ted Kennedy, unless it's for fun & you're having a drink
3. People who are trying to explain, "You can't...."

3 absolute favorite foods:
1. Chocolate.
2. Chicken
3. Bread, rolls, and the like

3 things I'd like to learn:
1. Gaelic
2. How to have a better poker face
3. How to hypnotize people (insert evil laugh here)

3 beverages I drink regularly:
1. Coke
2. Water
3. Tea

3 shows I watched as a kid:
1. Victory At Sea!
2. The Rifleman
3. Rex Trailer's BoomTown

3 people I'm tagging
Hope they don't take this personally
1. Sgt. B
2. Barb
3. BCR

MG Rick Lynch

Army Major Gen. Rick Lynch, command general of the 3rd Infantry Division, right, applauds Vice President Dick Cheney as he speaks to the troops of the Army's 3rd Infantry Division Friday, July 21, 2006, during his visit to Fort Stewart, Ga. Cheney thanked the soldiers from the division and the 48th Georgia National Guard for their service in Iraq during Operation Iraqi Freedom. (AP Photo/Stephen Morton)

Rick and the Veep, yeah!

Everything Hurts

I went to yoga tonight after a long hiatus.........I was lucky to shower.

The Navy Over At The Castle

The Chief is posting about the Navy over at The Castle. He has this picture labeled to indicate it is the "artist's conception" of the DD(X). Funny!

Here is the real deal.

For Those Who Think Hezbollah Is Not Our Problem

Michelle Malkin has an excellent Vent on this.

H/T to Matty at BlackFive

Tanker Brothers

The Tanker Brothers have been busy boys this summer. Now, in addition to their "Rolling Victory Fast 2006" They are nominated for a blog award. Go here and vote for them. I know they're running against Matty & Uncle Jimbo......I'm still telling you to vote for them.

Then go over to read about today's participant and sign up for a day of fasting in support of Victory!

My Hair

When I was a little girl, my hair was black. At 16 it began to turn white. It's a common trait on my mother's side of the family. I let it turn for years, it came in quite handy. Grayhaired women seldom get carded, even when they should be.

In my mid 30s my mother's constant pleading won out and I began to dye it. It was over 50% white. At first, I did the do-it-yourself and that was ok for a while. My ex used to be really good at it after a couple of beers, or I would head over to my mother's house with the box of dye, some wine and crackers and cheese and my sisters and I would make a hen party of it.

Then my ex and I split and somehow I didn't think his new g/f would appreciate him coming over to dye my hair (although sometimes, if I had a date I would pop over and play with his daughter while he ironed my outfit, lol). So I began to go to a salon. At first, I wanted it to be dyed back to the natural color of my youth, but that's not really a good idea because it looks harsh on women as they age. So I went lighter...dark brown.....medium brown.....blond streaks....just shoulder length. People whose opinions I valued, liked it.

Then along comes SB. "Please don't cut it....ever." Fine.

Then "I've always wanted to date a redhead." Fine.

I go to my next salon visit and announce to Sue..."We have to dye it red." Chaos, other stylist are brought in. No one thinks it's a good idea. It fades, it's high maintenence (like me), it won't suit me, if you're not careful you can get "hot roots" (the white part growing in, now 75% would turn pink, ugh) ........ "Oh well" I say "SB always wanted to date a redhead...we can't have him dating anyone else, can we?!" They try it, holding their breath and in the end they love it. It is a HUGE pain in the ass to maintain. My appointments went from being every 4 weeks to every 3 weeks. I have to get a whole line of hair care products just to keep it from fading. The conditioner that keeps it the best is discontinued by Biolage and I have to bid for it on EBAY. My brother makes endless fun of me.

Friday night SB blows into town. It's hot and humid and despite my too-damn-expensive Phyto anti-frizz and my much sought after Biolage conditioner, my curls are limp and my hair is frizzy. The first words out of his mouth are "Your hair looks great, baby."

No shit, buddy..........I like it when I get my way too!

See?

You Are 72% Evil You are very evil. And you're too evil to care.
Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot.
***You Are 72% Evil***

How Evil Are You?

I tell people that I am evil and they smile indulgently. Then I do something mean and they act shocked. I don't get it! Just the other day The Mistress of Argghhh asked me in a reproving tone...."Maggie, have you no heart?"

Now you know.

H/T to ALa.

Israel vs. Terrorists

Being a complete political/foreign affairs junkie, I am avidly following events in the Middle East. I yell at the stories on NPR. I mull over what they have to say on FoxNews and other news outlets. But largely, my opinion is reflected quite accurately in this cartoon (that seems a frivilous word for such a serious message).
I first saw this over at Lex's place. He credits Steve at "The Wood Shed" who tips the hat to Heidi, who mentions LGF and finally you get to IDF Israel!!!!!! I am exhausted!

OPFOR Wargaming

There is some really interesting stuff over at OPFOR on Israel striking Iran. The comments are as good as the posts. I only comment there when I am super sure of what I am saying (infrequent) or being a smartass (far more common).

First read "Israel Can Go The Distance"

Then, "The Genisis Of A Deep Penetration Raid"

Charlie is being deployed and won't be posting for a bit. He's a great guy, an intresting read and I wish him very well.

The new guy is Navy, mmmmm.

I Bought Myself a Present in Seattle

And I need it since I laughed at this joke over at The Castle!

Time For Change

I don't know if it's my age, or just time, or the phase of the moon........but I need to change jobs soon. I am very good at what I do..........flirting with old men and making them more breathless than when they first got their oxygen. But certain conflicts have progressed to the point where the downside is outweighing the good points. It used to be that I looked forward to work and had no problem working 50+ hours per week. But lately, with every passing day, I dread coming here more. I am lucky to hit 40 hours in a week. Sometimes I am physically here and just not punched in. I blog and surf while I sit at my desk to be available to answer the girl's questions and the phones, but I am not really working. It's a big difference from 18 months ago. It has been getting steadily worse. It's not good for anyone and I am becoming more guilt ridden and resentful every day.

However, it's a good paycheck and it will be hard to duplicate.

Part of me wants to quit.....sell the house.....and take whatever job would cover a roof over my head, my books, lectures and hair coloring. If I could barter room and board, I could live on very little. Unfortunately, if I sell the house, the boys would kill me.

Well, there's always the lottery. Please leave the winning numbers in the comments.